Clarissa Jacobson

Apr 6, 20182 min

Lunch Ladies Official Selection Of Crimson Screen Fest After Delivering Programmers Tainted Clover

Updated: Jan 29, 2019

Reports from the dark web have confirmed that the Lunch Ladies are celebrating with some Joan Jett karaoke after successfully delivering programmers of South Carolina's Crimson Screen Horror Film Fest some tainted clover.

Apparently the nefarious clover comes from the depths of South America (but can be found in a rat-infested field behind Melvin High) and has spores that when inhaled cause confusion and brain blur. Investigators say that Crimson programmers received an unassuming FTD Floral Bouquet and shortly after chose the Lunch Ladies to screen at the fest.

Said Seretta, coughing from the smoke machine she bought in tandem with the karaoke machine: "We knew our reputation wasn't the best in the Carolinas especially after we burned our bridges at Nevermore Fest where we won Best North American Short."

LouAnne, slicking her hair back like Joan Jett with some LA Looks Extreme Hold Gel, continued: "Exactly. The only legit way for us to get in that Crimson Screen Fest was with some bad clover. Over and over. Thanks guys!"

The Lunch Ladies play at the Crimson Screen Horror Film Fest on Saturday, May 26 at 11:45 am in Comedy Shorts Block One.

Buy Tickets HERE!

The fifth annual Crimson Screen Horror Film Fest takes place in Charleston, SC May 25-27 2018. Best of South Carolina named them a top 10 fest in South Carolina in 2017 and they were voted 2nd favorite film festival by readers of Horror Society in 2015! Back in January, Mac Brewer of Horror Society gave the Lunch Ladies one of their favorite reviews EVER: "Lunch Ladies is a mother f*cking masterpiece."

Follow Crimson Screen Horror Fest at:

Website: www.crimsonscreenfilmfest.org
 
Facebook: @crimsonscreenfilmfest

Twitter: @crimsonscreen

#FilmFestival #CrimsonScreenHorrorFest #SouthCarolina #HorrorSociety #MacBrewer #NevermoreFilmFest #Awards

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