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  • Writer's pictureClarissa Jacobson

ORANGE ALERT! Lunch Ladies Now On ShortsTV - Dept. Of Homeland Security - "Act Of Terrorism"


The Department of Homeland Security has put the country on Orange Alert after the news that the Lunch Ladies have not only invaded living rooms by hijacking airplay on Prime Video, Canal+ in France and Kanopy but have now manipulated their way on to ShortsTV this week as Editor's Pick!

Said Dr. Todd McSweeney (Head of the newly formed "Psychological & Unusual Punishment Threats" Branch): "The fact that Americans cannot turn on their TV without seeing the Lunch Ladies is an act of terrorism. This sick, twisted, murdering, Johnny Depp loving duo has no place in society. We must protect the moral fibers of this country!"

Seretta, wearing a bedazzled red white and blue string bikini, sneered: "Scr*w you, McSweeney - we are Americans to the core - rebellious and free to do whatever the h*ll we want!"

LouAnne, wearing dozens of red white and blue bandanas tied around her ripped jeans in an ode to the 80s, concurred: "McSweeney, take your orange alert and shove it. We will continue to screen everywhere free people gather. To the revolution!"

The Lunch Ladies screen on ShortsTV this April 7 at 1am. Sign up now - it's the patriotic thing to do.

*Special thank you to the Lunch Ladies' beleaguered sales rep Ouat Media for hooking up another great streaming company!

**The amazing drawing above of the Lunch Ladies - "Pair Nets" - is by Craig Mills. Uncanny resemblance isn't it?

Follow ShortsTV at:

Facebook: @shortstvus


Instagram: @shortstvus

See the Lunch Ladies on ShortsTV HD on April 7 at 4AM Eastern Standard - get your a*ses up with the rooster ya delinquentz!

See the Lunch Ladies on Kanopy HERE

Kanopy Lunch Ladies

See the Lunch Ladies on Prime Video HERE

Prime Video Lunch Ladies

France and her territories can see the Lunch Ladies on Canal+ at MyCanal

Canal+ My Canal Lunch Ladies



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