The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have scored a selection at the Knoxville Horror Film Fest after getting programmers drunk on homemade Lunch Lady whiskey.
Tennessee is famous for its whiskey - especially Jack Daniels. The Lunch Ladies - as usual - have manipulated and perverted something of state pride and used it against locals to get ahead:
Said Seretta, enjoying a shot of the handcrafted 200 proof Lunch Lady whiskey they foisted on unsuspecting programmers: "Wheww! That stings! Anyhoo, we needed to get into that fest. Getting those lightweights so snookered they selected us was key."
LouAnne, frosting a lumpy "moon pie" (that looks suspiciously like an ear) which she plans to gift the fest, nodded: "Thanks Knoxville for screening us! Hope that hangover wears off soon!"
The tenth annual Knoxville Horror Film Fest is the only horror festival in Tennessee and runs from October 18-21. The Lunch Ladies screen on Saturday, October 20.
Details can be found HERE!
*Principal Grossfetig will be attending the festival so make sure to get your picture with him and make DOUBLY sure to have him sign off on your report card.
Follow Knoxville Horror Film Fest at:
Twitter: @knoxhorrorfest
Instagram: @knoxhorrorfest
For tons 'o fun check out Tennessee Horror News! Our pals are hoping to attend the fest and want to remind everyone: "Don't do acid and watch this movie."