Clarissa Jacobson
Lunch Ladies Win Nevermore's & Jay Kay's Best Horror Shorts Of 2018 - "Scr*w You, Oscars"
In a shocking display of bad sportsmanship, the Lunch Ladies - who were qualified for the 2019 Oscars but did not get a nom - have gone...
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Clarissa Jacobson
- Jan 14, 2019
- 2 min
"VOTE FOR US PLEAZE!" Lunch Ladies Harass Folks For Votes At Gruesome Magazine
The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have been harassing folks like yourself everywhere to vote for them in Gruesome...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Oct 16, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Win Best Foreign Short At MABO Puerto Rico & Score Love From Reviewers - Haters Gripe
Festival de Cortometrajes de MABO awarded the Lunch Ladies this awesome handmade trophy done by a Puerto Rican artist. IN TOP NEWS TODAY:...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Oct 8, 2018
- 1 min
Lunch Ladies Garner Selection From Knoxville Horror Fest By Getting Them Drunk On Lunch Lady Whiskey
The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have scored a selection at the Knoxville Horror Film Fest after getting programmers...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Aug 8, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Celebrate With 162 Hour Johnny Depp Movie Marathon After Scoring Three Great Reviews
Shocked news outlets across the world are reporting that the Lunch Ladies have scored great reviews* from Nightmarish Conjurings,...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jul 25, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Slip Wormwood Tea To Nevermore Horror & Just Celebrity Mag To Garner Killer Reviews
The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have slipped Wormwood Tea to the reporters at Nevermore Horror and Just Celebrity...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jul 24, 2018
- 1 min
Lunch Ladies Duped AGAIN By Johnny Depp Impersonator - In Denial
Back in January, the Lunch Ladies were fooled by Johnny Depp impersonator, John Spaziale who showed up at their kitchen with roses...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jul 18, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Concerned For Their Safety After Bitches Of Horror Say They're Perfect and Copy Them
JUST IN! The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies are concerned for their safety after the Bitches of Horror gave them a "10 out...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jul 16, 2018
- 1 min
Dr. McSweeney Prescribes Lunch Ladies Unreasonable Shorts Screening After They Demand Good Reviews
The past few weeks the Lunch Ladies have been incredibly unreasonable by threatening, harassing and demanding terrific reviews from a...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1 min
Ginger Nuts Of Horror Suggest Lunch Ladies More Enjoyable Than A Quickie
The dark web has confirmed that Joe X Young of the Ginger Nuts of Horror has suggested that the Lunch Ladies are more enjoyable than a...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jul 9, 2018
- 2 min
Eerie Late Night Horror Show Interviews The Lunch Ladies After They Give Them Nightmares
The dark web has confirmed that the Eerie Late Night Horror Show had the Lunch Ladies on after they invaded their dreams and gave them...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jun 27, 2018
- 1 min
Lunch Ladies Score Sweet Write-Up From Horrorscreams Video Vault After Locking Reviewer In Dungeon
The Lunch Ladies have scored a sweet write-up from UK website Horrorscreams Video Vault after locking their unsuspecting journalist,...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jun 26, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Stage Sit-In On 13th Floor To Garner Awesome Review - "Our A*ses Hurt"
The Lunch Ladies are pampering sore behinds after sitting for 186 hours straight in front of reviewer Jeremiah Rosario of the Thirteenth...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jun 20, 2018
- 1 min
Lunch Ladies Score A Spot On The Bitches Of Horror TV Show After Astounding Catfight
Rumors are confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have scored a spot to brag about themselves on The Bitches Of Horror TV Show after they...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jun 18, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Send Heart Emojis to The Horror Syndicate After They Get A Stellar Review/Interview
The Lunch Ladies have been texting Mike Lombardo of The Horror Syndicate for days on end* with heart emojis after his recent amazing...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Jun 15, 2018
- 1 min
GoreLords Podcast Loves The Lunch Ladies - Lunch Ladies Firmly Tell Them: “We’re Taken.”
JUST IN! The dark web has confirmed that the GoreLords Podcast loves the Lunch Ladies who have firmly told them “We’re Taken.” ...
Clarissa Jacobson
- May 9, 2018
- 1 min
Lunch Ladies "Seduce" Neon Bloodbath Into An Interview By Getting Naked And Taking Over His Tub
Spies from the dark web have confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have "seduced" the blogger "Bury The Beloved" from the website Neon...
Clarissa Jacobson
- May 7, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Have 186 Hour Slumber Party Watching Encore! France 24 Documentary
The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have had a 186 hour slumber party watching Encore! France 24's documentary about the...
Clarissa Jacobson
- May 2, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Get Film Coterie To Screen Them At Marcon Convention After Offering Gift Of Pot Pie
The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have scored another screening; this time at Marcon Multiple Alternative Realities...
Clarissa Jacobson
- Apr 23, 2018
- 2 min
Lunch Ladies Interviewed By MUFF Society - Discuss The Depper But Avoid Topic Of Murder
Reports from the dark web have confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have been interviewed by the Monthly Underground Female Film Society aka...
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