#NightmaresFilmFest

Clarissa Jacobson

Nov 5, 2018
2 min

Film Coterie Gifts Lunch Ladies Swag Bags At Nightmares Film Fest - Include Creepy Teddy Bear

Last year, the Lunch Ladies screened at Nightmares Film Fest where they won their very first award - Best Horror Comedy. It's hard to believe a full year has gone by, but yes, those crazy b*tches have been annoying people for over a year. This year, The Film Coterie - sick and twisted critics who love the Lunch Ladies - decided for old times, to send the ladies one of their special late night survival swag bags that they gift to lucky Nightmares filmmakers each year. Sere

Newest Hairnet Club Member Tells Lunch Ladies She Dreams Of A World Where Every Cat Has A Hairnet

Clarissa Jacobson

Jul 26, 2018
2 min

Newest Hairnet Club Member Tells Lunch Ladies She Dreams Of A World Where Every Cat Has A Hairnet

JUST IN! The Lunch Ladies' newest Hairnet Club member, a silky black cat by the name of Jaeger, told the women that she dreams of a world where every feline, rich or poor, fat or skinny, ugly or beautiful, will be able to wear a hairnet. The Lunch Ladies are deeply moved. A few months ago, the Lunch Ladies started the Hairnet Club in an effort to legitimize the bastard child of fashion but had no idea the club would bring hope to so many: Said Seretta, petting one of their f

Lunch Ladies Up To Same Old Sh*t - Badger Beleaguered Austin Revolution Film Fest Into Seven Noms

Clarissa Jacobson

Jul 12, 2018
2 min

Lunch Ladies Up To Same Old Sh*t - Badger Beleaguered Austin Revolution Film Fest Into Seven Noms

It's astounding, but yes, the Lunch Ladies are up to the same old sh*t. This time they've badgered a beleaguered Austin Revolution Film Fest into seven nominations including: Best U.S. Horror Short, Best U.S. Comedy Short, Scarlet Waters Best Genre Award, Women In Horror Award, Best Genre Filmmaker Tobe Award*, Michelle Mower Female Filmmaker Of The Year Award* and Best FX Award**. Austin Revolution, in a move they've since regretted, met the Lunch Ladies at Nightmares Film

Lunch Ladies Verklempt After Hot Male Joins Their Hairnet Club

Clarissa Jacobson

May 4, 2018
2 min

Lunch Ladies Verklempt After Hot Male Joins Their Hairnet Club

The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies are verklempt after a hot male named Maverick joined their Hairnet Club. Apparently, the women have admitted that "Other than the Depper, we've never been popular with the opposite sex; until now." Last month, the Lunch Ladies started the Hairnet Club in an effort to legitimize the bastard child of fashion. Several hot males joined off the bat, but the ladies thought it was only for the hairnets. Said Seretta, blowing her nos

Lunch Ladies Get Film Coterie To Screen Them At Marcon Convention After Offering Gift Of Pot Pie

Clarissa Jacobson

May 2, 2018
2 min

Lunch Ladies Get Film Coterie To Screen Them At Marcon Convention After Offering Gift Of Pot Pie

The dark web has confirmed that the Lunch Ladies have scored another screening; this time at Marcon Multiple Alternative Realities Convention in Columbus, Ohio - the Midwest's premiere Science Fiction & Fantasy Fest (which has been running for an astounding 53 years) - by offering "delicious" pot pies to The Film Coterie, who they met at the Nightmares Film Fest. Apparently, The Film Coterie was tasked with programming the midnight shorts for Marcon and decided to screen the

EXCLUSIVE! Lunch Ladies Guilt Touching Xmas Film - She Was So Pretty - Into Screening With Them

Clarissa Jacobson

Dec 1, 2017
2 min

EXCLUSIVE! Lunch Ladies Guilt Touching Xmas Film - She Was So Pretty - Into Screening With Them

The Lunch Ladies are riding high on guilting heartwarming Christmas Horror - She Was So Pretty: Be Good For Goodness Sake and warm, fuzzy, serial killer short - Compulsion into screening with them. In this exclusive interview, Seretta and LouAnne describe in chilling detail how they pulled off this amazing coup: Seretta: "We saw She Was So Pretty: Be Good For Goodness Sake at Nightmares Film Fest in Ohio last month. They were part of the in-crowd. Ugh. However, unlike the

Murder Pays Off! Austin Revolution Film Fest Invites Lunch Ladies for 2018

Clarissa Jacobson

Nov 15, 2017
1 min

Murder Pays Off! Austin Revolution Film Fest Invites Lunch Ladies for 2018

The Lunch Ladies were riding high on their Best Horror Comedy wins at South African Horrorfest, Atlanta Horror Fest and Nightmares Fest when things got even BETTER. Turns out Nightmares Film Festival has a reciprocal agreement with Austin Revolution Film Fest to automatically select some of one another's best films to screen in the next year's line up. Looks like Lunch Ladies along with La Sirena and Girl #2 are headed to Texas!!! This can only mean one thing. Murder pays

The Lunch Ladies Cozy Up To The Film Coterie Proving Ass Kissing Really Does Work

Clarissa Jacobson

Nov 8, 2017
1 min

The Lunch Ladies Cozy Up To The Film Coterie Proving Ass Kissing Really Does Work

The Lunch Ladies will do anything to get a little publicity. When they found out The Film Coterie, would be doing a recap on Nightmares Film Fest, Seretta fluttered her eyelashes, thrust out her double D's, and told them they were brilliant. LouAnne slicked back her ducktail and told them they were handsome. That's all it took. SUCKERS! The Film Coterie said: "Lunch Ladies from Clarissa Jacobson and Josh Logan took home Nightmares Best Horror Comedy Short award and it had so

Lunch Ladies Win Best Horror Comedy at Atlanta Horror Fest - Principal Grossfetig Hijacks Trophy

Clarissa Jacobson

Oct 24, 2017
1 min

Lunch Ladies Win Best Horror Comedy at Atlanta Horror Fest - Principal Grossfetig Hijacks Trophy

Fresh off the heels of winning Best Horror Comedy at Nightmares Film Fest the Ladies got the surprise news that they won Best Horror Comedy at Atlanta Horror Fest too! However, much to their chagrin, they never saw the trophy. The Lunch Ladies were unable to make the fest due to unforeseen issues (they took the Orient Express to Atlanta hoping to meet Johnny Depp and got lost in Budapest). At the behest of the producers, Principal Grossfetig attended in their place for an un

The Lunch Ladies Wake Up From Nightmares to Win Best Horror Comedy!

Clarissa Jacobson

Oct 23, 2017
1 min

The Lunch Ladies Wake Up From Nightmares to Win Best Horror Comedy!

Let's be honest. The past two decades have been a flipping nightmare for the ladies. No respect, no love, no Johnny Depp. So, imagine the surprise when they woke up at Nightmares Film Festival to win Best Horror Comedy! The Lunch Ladies, who showed up to the ceremony in Harry Winston tiaras and sequined polyester gowns by Dress Barn, could not believe they won against such an awesome lineup of sick and funny films. Seretta said: "We saw every single short we were up agains

Nominated For Nightmares Fest Best Horror Comedy, Harry Winston Gifts Lunch Ladies Diamond Tiaras

Clarissa Jacobson

Oct 17, 2017
1 min

Nominated For Nightmares Fest Best Horror Comedy, Harry Winston Gifts Lunch Ladies Diamond Tiaras

The Lunch Ladies are thrilled to be attending the Nightmares Fest this week but are even more excited about the diamond tiaras the infamous jeweler to the stars, Harry Winston, has gifted them to wear at the awards ceremony. They received the call from Mr. Winston's Personal Assistant, Todd Sweeney III, minutes after being nominated for Best Horror Comedy. Sweeney said "Harry Winston diamonds have been worn by the finest women in show business - from Elizabeth Taylor to Hall

Lunch Ladies Have A Double Date With Leatherface at Nightmares Film Fest!

Clarissa Jacobson

Oct 2, 2017
2 min

Lunch Ladies Have A Double Date With Leatherface at Nightmares Film Fest!

The Lunch Ladies are ecstatic! Turns out, not only was the film accepted into one of the best horror fests in the nation - NIGHTMARES FEST in Columbus, Ohio... but they are opening the celebration with one of their main squeezes: Leatherface of Texas Chainsaw Massacre! Leatherface starring Stephen Dorff & Lili Taylor is the pre-quel to Tobe Hooper's 1974 original and it will only be doing a limited run of ten shows across America. The Lunch Ladies are super stoked because

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